I just wanted to give a proper update this morning. I was feeling bleh last night but I didn't want anyone to worry because I hadn't posted in a couple days.
First of all, we have a picture of the view from ward 57. All the views are pretty because we are right beside the river valley.
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So as I said before, I got cyclophosphamide yesterday. In high doses, this drug has the interesting affect of "Wasabi Nose". Essentially, its like the worst sinus cold and the pressure is intense. For me, it made me nauseated because of the pressure on my eyes, I couldn't see straight. But it did stop after a while.
Also with this drug, they want the patient to drink 2 to 3 litres in addition to all the fluids that come in the chemo. Cyclophosphamide is a very harsh drug and they want it out of the system as fast as possible. Being the uber good patient, I got in my 3 litres in short order but then it wouldn't leave my system. I ended up gaining 10 lbs. I did lose some overnight but the doctor gave me a diuretic to get rid of the rest.
Unfortunately, it started my anxiety up. I was desperate yesterday to get rid of the fluids thinking about all the nasty side effects. When the nurse told me that mobility would help, I got up and walked a kilometre and a half around the ward (not a good idea with a hemoglobin of 70). Then later at night, my lungs were feeling heavy and I was coughing a little. Of course my anxiety took me straight to pneumonia! But in all likelihood, its just a combo of low hemoglobin and too much fluid.
I once was accused of being a hypochondriac by a well-intention GP. I immediately changed doctors to someone who understood that me be overprotective about my health is how I stay alive. I don't endorse self-diagnosis and I have a team of health professionals who I trust but sometimes that anxiety does rear its ugly head.
It is something I have to be cautious about because worry does me no good. The anxiety also tends to produce non-compliance in me. But I have to say, I have a great team down here. One of my nurses in particular, Galia, is fantastic. She gets me and that is huge for me. I will introduce you to her in future posts.
David said the time down here has not been as stressful as he imagined. We pretty well do the same stuff as at home: watch football matches, drink tea and go for walks. I think he actually enjoys it. He gets to watch more football and hockey here than at home, he gets cake specially brought in by the nurses and that massage chair! Positively spoiled he is!
Tomorrow I will introduce you to some of my staff and get some more pictures of the unit just for something different.
Lots of love and hugs,
E
Hello, my darling Elizabeth. I've been reading your blog and wondering what kind of comment I could possibly leave to tell you how amazing and strong and brave and bright and beautiful and articulate I think you are--no, I know you are. I have always felt so blessed to have you in my life--despite the miles and years that have kept us apart.
ReplyDeleteNo matter what I thought to say, though, it didn't measure up to what I wanted to say. Then I got a dose of wisdom from you and realized I didn't need to worry about saying exactly the right thing. What I needed was to say anything, just to let you know I am thinking of you every single day. I am wishing I could be there with you every single day. I am thinking of Madeleine and David and your mom and Michael and Josh (whom I do not know), and I am wishing you all strength for this journey. And I am loving you, even when you can't see or hear or feel me there. In the quiet moments of those early mornings, I am there, and I am loving you.
I know you, Little Engine, and I know you can; I KNOW you can.
Diane
P.S. Who knew you were such a great cook?! Of course, you are, though; I've met your mom and eaten at her table. I'm dreaming of all of us together in front of a table full of cake, including castle cake and Kiev cake. I'll bring the forks ... deal?
My dearest Auntie and Justice of course,
ReplyDeleteThankyou for the beautiful comment I received today and well timed too!!! We are all on the journey together and whatever love we can give, in whatever shape, to one another, that is what we are asked to do. Thankyou for your message of love and support! And yes there will be cake, cake and more cake.... and you can definitely bring the forks.